Tuesday, September 15, 2009

When a Parent's Love Comes With Conditions - NYTimes.com

Mind - When a Parent's Love Comes With Conditions - NYTimes.com

Jo Frost of 'Supernanny,' in her book of the same name (Hyperion, 2005), says, 'The best rewards are attention, praise and love,' and these should be held back 'when the child behaves badly until she says she is sorry,' at which point the love is turned back on.

Conditional parenting isn't limited to old-school authoritarians. Some people who wouldn't dream of spanking choose instead to discipline their young children by forcibly isolating them, a tactic we prefer to call 'time out.' Conversely,' positive reinforcement' teaches children that they are loved, and lovable, only when they do whatever we decide is a 'good job.'

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